Morning WWWers, i have another forum thread for you today, this time from WWW regular and real bride Kelly. And she needs your help… with whether or not to have a dress code for her guests. We’d love your help, and of course feel free to chit chat and ask questions yourself. If you would like to start a thread on WWW please email me at lou@whimscalwonderlandweddings.com XOXO Lou
“Wedding guests should be appropriately dressed for a wedding. It is important to remember that weddings are usually quite a formal affair and people take the time to dress up and look their best.
Wedding etiquette dictates that dress codes are not included on a wedding invitation unless guests are required to adhere to an uncustomary code (such as black tie). Any unusual dress code should be explained in the extra information that goes out with the wedding invitations.
Traditionally, wedding dress attire for men is morning dress, or a suit with a shirt and tie.
Women should look elegant in a suit or dress – appropriate for the season and the weather – and may also wear a hat.
Appropriate shoes should be chosen if the wedding is outside or on grass.
Head-to-toe outfits in white or cream should never be worn and all black, unless cleverly accessorised, may look too sombre.
Hats are traditional, but by no means compulsory, at weddings. It is notoriously difficult to socially kiss while wearing a wide-brimmed hat. There is a knack to tilting the head at a suitable angle, but two ladies both in wide brimmed hats should avoid such an ‘intimate’ greeting.”
From the Debrett’s website
This is what the Debrett’s guide says regarding dress code etiquette. But at all weddings I have been to recently there has been at least one person dressed inappropriately. I mean tracksuit bottoms are not acceptable wedding attire in my mind!
I really want to re-iterate this point on our invites by requesting that people take the opportunity to dress to impress, we are going for quite a glam feel for our day and would love our guests to feel a part of it.
I have been met with quite a few opinions regarding this during the course of our planning, some saying it’s not at all appropriate and others who agree with me. My lovely groom doesn’t mind if I do it so happy days on that front.
What do you guys think? I need some help on this front. Please tell me if you disagree with me, would you include a dress code? Would you be offended if you received an invite with a dress code?
It’s not like I’m asking them to dress as Jungle animals or Star Wars characters is it?
Kelly
xXx
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Toni says:
I wouldn't be offended, but I am quite laid back so have the 'it's their wedding, they do what they want, I'll go with it' attitude to all weddings. I went to my boyfriend's cousins reception, and his uncle had turned up wearing what he wears everyday- a moss green fleece, khaki combat trousers and trainers. It just made us laugh that he turned up to the ceremony wearing that, but that's just who he is and no one minded. I don't think it ruins the wedding if somebody wears the wrong clothes! Just looks a bit weird lol.
Ruth H says:
Hey Kelly,
Thought i'd help out by saying that I would love it if people put dress codes on their wedding invites! I often stress over what to wear (because I am a human female!) and I find it sooo much easier when people tell you what to aim for. I totally agree with what you said about there always being at least one inappropriately dressed person at a wedding. In fact at the wedding I attended on Saturday it was a bum skimming, skin tight number with visable (slightly greying) bra straps. On the flip side I have been to weddings that were pretty casual and felt over dressed because I just assume weddings are very formal.
I am intending to give guests a prod in the right direction for my wedding in October. Mainly because the ceremony takes place in a semi-outdoors place and I don't want people to be cold.
It's your day and if people want to be there and share it with you they shouldn't mind looking nice to do it.
Hope that helps your decision. Good luck!
R x
Grace says:
I have seen men wearing tracksuit bottoms and denim at a wedding - both are totally unacceptable in my eyes! I think you're within your rights to specify a dress code :)
Pip says:
@ Ruth H - Love the sound of that semi-outdoor place!
We're getting married on a farm, not a plush converted barn venue, an actual working dairy farm. We've made sure though that no one will need to traipse through mud and fields (unless they want to) and I'd really love people to dress up wedding style as I think it will create a great atmosphere contrasted with the rustic backdrop.
Like you, Kelly, I've agonised over this as I don't want to be too prescriptive. I do think though that once people realise the nature of the location, they will probably worry so I think some direction is necessary. Do you think people will get some kind of idea of the expected style of dress once they know your venue?
I was thinking something along the lines of 'By all means bring your wellies, but unless we have unusually inclement weather they will not be necessary. It's a farm, but please feel free to dress as glamourously as you like, we will be!' - Hmm - I think I'm going to have to give this a bit more thought!
Kelly says:
Ooo good to know I'm not alone in this and that you have re-inforced that I am always right ;-)
Plus you guys have some awesome sounding weddings being planned, I hope we'll get to see them on these lovely {WWW} pages.xxx